17 years ago today, my big sister died.
Her name was Tracy, and she was 7 years older than me.
She was 21 at the time.
I wish my children had gotten the chance to meet her. Since they won’t, I thought I’d write a letter to them about her.
Dear Noah & Lizzie,
Your Aunt Tracy lived a short, bittersweet life. She was an only child for 7 years before I came along.
My earliest memories of Tracy are of us playing Barbies together. She was very particular about things and as her baby sister, I rarely played along with her scenarios correctly .
It didn’t matter to me though. She meant the world to me.
We would dance for hours in the driveway. We’d choreograph routines to Debbie Gibson and the New Kids on the Block with the other kids in the neighborhood while blaring the music from our boombox.
We’d stay out way after dark and catch lightning bugs and then let them all go at once. It was such a beautiful sight to see them all flutter away.
I remember she had a hard time making friends in high school and she struggled with learning. She was a happy person though and her happiness made me happy.
We fought a good deal (as all siblings do), but I always knew she loved me.
- Pens…she LOVED pens! It was kind of an obsession of hers
- Soap Operas (she’s the one that got me hooked on Days of Our Lives and General Hospital!)
- Music (she could make a mean mix tape off the radio!)
- She had the HUGEST crush on a news anchor back then. His name was Tony Potts. Like she wrote letters to him about how much she loved him.
She was a great big sister to me, but she was the BEST big sister to your Aunt Crisie. Our mom was sick for several years prior to her passing away and Tracy took care of Crisie like she was her own daughter.
She was a loving, compassionate and kind woman and I’m so sad that you never get to meet her.
I know she would have loved you both so very much.
Thankfully, I know she’s watching over both of you right now from Heaven. Just one of your many guardian angels.
A bit over a year ago, my father passed away. My mother actually passed away just a few months prior to my sister dying. All I have left of my sister is memories. Few people can validate these memories for me and even fewer people actually remember Tracy at all.
I will ALWAYS remember her. I will ALWAYS miss her. There might not be too many of us left that remember her living, but she touched the hearts and souls of all that knew her and that can never be taken away.